Sunday, October 29, 2006

Possession

I've been a hostel resident for more than a year now, and today I faced fresh evidence that I've been possessed by the spirit that rules all hostellers. Its quite a strange spirit, though. It doesn't make you break out into incomprehensible sacred languages or perform twitchy dances that resemble the imaginings of some anthropologist of old about Africa. All it does is thoroughly invert your food habits and turn you into some kind of trash magnet. Let me illustrate.

Today was a friend's birthday, and I was invited for lunch. I woke up (late) with happy visions of sumptuous cuisines dangling in front of my eyes. As a result of the late dawning of my day, I'd missed breakfast and was in a better position to HOG. I jauntily made my way to this Italian ristorante (hehe...me being a snob). My friends also made their way there and, lo! lunch was in progress. I ordered an exotic sounding dish called Red Pesto Chicken, which was basically yummy chicken stuffed with magnificient filling, accompanied with pasta, veggies, brown bread and pesto sauce. I tucked in with full gusto. For about ten minutes, there was pin drop silence at our table. But then , with almost one-third of the chicken looking up at me appealingly, I realized that I couldn't eat another bite!!!! I was heartsore, looking at all that gorgeous food, willing myself to eat, and finally, looking on tamely as the waiter removed my plate. Sigh.

The sad bit is, when I'm eating in the hostel mess, I'm usually stuffing my face with half-cooked cabbage, or specks of dal in chilli powder sauce and so on. I gorge on terrible food, day after day, incomprehensibly. Good food reduces me to a demure maiden who pecks at her plate. I wondered for about five minutes, and then it hit me. You see, hostellers develop an exaggerated version of the survival instinct over time. So no matter what the food tastes like, as long as its there, and as long as your stomach doesn't burst, you eat. Eventually, you lose all appreciation for fine cuisine, and the transformation from gourmand to pig is complete. I'm on my way to becoming my porcine reincarnation. Its only a matter of time now. The aforementioned spirit has well and truly taken me over.... HELP!

14 comments:

ninkita said...

teehee!!
just the other day skt and i were discussing how hostel life messes up food habits...
i know! tu ghar aaja... i'll nurse your tum back to human-ness... how does a nice chocolate fudge brownie sound? or do you think we ought to start with some simple uncomplicated food first? theres this particular bake i've been dying to try out...
;)

heh? ok said...

oh man....kuch bhi...but that choco fudge wouldn't hurt either :P

sun4none said...

good 2 kno u live 2 eat n not eat 2 live... really get irritated by ppl who just eat 2 survive

sun4none said...

aah.. good u switched 2 beta blogger.. was wondering hw ur blog got updated so quickly

heh? ok said...

@ sun
yeah, thanks for the tip. i was getting really worked up. and yeah, i mostly live to eat. anky will bear witness. as a result of the switch to beta, you became anonymous for a while..hehe

main! said...

this has nothing to do with the blog....
you know i am sooo happy and i dont know why and its happened aftr so long...and the strange part is i have a cold i am stuck at home have nothing to do, probabky will be at home for another 2 days because of the dilli bandh and i hate being at home, the weather outside is pathetic etc etc...
sangy aaja tu mera khana kha lena...see i have lost y appetite and i am still happy!!!!strange na?

Bipasha said...

I sooo totally relate to it.... But why did u just mention the hostelers.... People like us also share the same woe....

heh? ok said...

@ bips
you blogging too? cool
@ sim
i'm glad you're so happy but mid sem pass hai so can't take up the very tempting invite :(

heh? ok said...

also, the reason i mentioned only hostellers is that while pg folks like you also suffer, and i've been through so much of that, the spectacle of a 100 people gorging at full speed in a mess hall is confined to hostels...much more evocative, no?

Ranjit said...

" food glorious food, what more can I ask for ? " sound familiar ??? damn, I missed that lunch...

You've articulated, beyond perfection, the way every hosteller feels... Oh well, am off for more dal and aaloo now ... anychance I'd get some of that chocolate fudge brownie ???

heh? ok said...

@ ranjit
stick around. brownies won't come your way without perseverance

ninkita said...

ermm... this chocolate fudge brownie in question.. is it the one i'm supposed to provide?
just curious.
:P

heh? ok said...

@ nin
the brownie is metaphorical for all good food. am not sharing your brownies!!

Exigo Animus said...

darn..so much abou food nw!
i eat 2 live.. hunger is the most ingredinet..dont care abou nething else..